The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 25-1

  PART 1: A WASTE OF TIME     PART 2: A WASTE OF MONEY   PART 3: A WASTE                                                                                                  #25 – AFTER BURNER     Just when you thought it was safe to play Sega’s After Burner on your NES, the licensing gods cursed every illegally produced cartridge, making the result thoroughly … Continue reading The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 25-1

The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 50-26

  PART 1 IS THE SIPPY CUP   PART 2 IS THE ADULT GLASS                                                                    #50 – MENACE BEACH/SUNDAY FUNDAY: THE RIDE     Menace Beach was released three times throughout the NES’ lifespan: once in a multi-cart, once by itself, and once as a re-skin called Sunday Funday. Color Dreams/Wisdom Tree must have … Continue reading The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 50-26

The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 73-51

  IF YOU CARE ABOUT ORDER, YOU’LL READ PART 1 FIRST!                                                                                                            #73 – PLATOON     I imagine navigating through swaths of Vietnam jungle would be confusing, particularly if you’re a terrified American boy who’s in over his head. Platoon replicates the roaming-through-Vietnam experience almost too well. It’s incredibly easy to get lost, … Continue reading The 86 Worst NES Games: #s 73-51

The 86 Worst NES Games: Introduction and #s 86-74

  During my quest, I graded at least 100 games with an “F” rating. Countless others received scores in the “D” and “C” range. No doubt about it: there’s an overwhelming amount of terrible titles for the NES. While the system’s great games will forever hold places in our hearts, so too will the bad; … Continue reading The 86 Worst NES Games: Introduction and #s 86-74

Weekend Roundup: Reviews for the Masses

  Far be it from me to shortchange anybody’s request for a game review, but… you all gave me a lot of requests; 43, if my math isn’t mistaken. There’s no way I can devote large chunks of time to each game – especially deep titles like Sweet Home, Mother, or Final Fantasy 2 and … Continue reading Weekend Roundup: Reviews for the Masses

Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti – By Request

                                                                                                                                         A fresh take on a bloody favorite.                                                                                                      Cause it’s… Wanpaku? PLAYERS: 1 PUBLISHER: Namco(t) DEVELOPER: NOW Production GENRE: Action RELEASE DATE: July 1989   It’s amazing that the Splatterhouse series didn’t offend more parental sensibilities when its sequel debuted on the Genesis in 1992. The series wasn’t just gory: it … Continue reading Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti – By Request

Summer Carnival ’92: Recca – By Request

                                                                                                                                          Now you’re playing with power.                                                                                                                                                          Death! It is everywhere!   PLAYERS: 1 PUBLISHER: Naxat Soft DEVELOPER: KID GENRE: Shoot-em-up RELEASE DATE: July 1992   Imagine a summer carnival in 1992: carousels, fried twinkies, vomit, girls in skimpy clothing, enormous stuffed animals, glistening sweat. The carnival is a hazy fantasy that … Continue reading Summer Carnival ’92: Recca – By Request

International Cricket – By Request

                                                                       You have to dress like a member of Devo to participate in cricket.                                                                                                                            Swagger is also a requirement for bowlers.   PLAYERS: 1-2 simultaneous PUBLISHER: Laser Beam Entertainment DEVELOPER: Beam Software GENRE: Sports RELEASE DATE: 1992   Much to my chagrin, International Cricket is not about a cricket who travels … Continue reading International Cricket – By Request

The Top 86 NES Games – #s 25-1

  MY BRAIN IS ON FIRE. CLICK THE LINKS BELOW IF YOU NEED TO.   PART 1 PART 2 PART 3                                                                                                        #25 – R.C. Pro-Am II     Ok, so the four-player mode isn’t as awesome as I initially thought in my review. It doesn’t matter: R.C. Pro-Am II is still the best … Continue reading The Top 86 NES Games – #s 25-1

The Top 86 NES Games – #s 50-26

  READ THESE FIRST   PART 1   PART 2                                                                                             #50 – Bionic Commando     By taking away the ability to jump, Bionic Commando switched up the relatively new-ish (1988) platformer genre before it had a chance to grow stale. A bionic grappling arm is a pretty nifty way to get around, though … Continue reading The Top 86 NES Games – #s 50-26

The Top 86 NES Games – #’s 73-51

  READ PART 1 FIRST, YOU GLORIOUS MINSTRELS!                                                                                                                                          #73 – Shadow of the Ninja   Think Ninja Gaiden, but with speedier gameplay, two player co-op, and less cinematics. Shadow of the Ninja doesn’t feel like a rip-off of the Gaiden series, so much as it does an alternate universe; one where Ryu … Continue reading The Top 86 NES Games – #’s 73-51

The Top 86 NES Games – Introduction and #’s 86-74

  The NES was an amazing, groundbreaking, peach tree of a system, but choosing a mere 86 games to champion over the rest was a sweat-less task. The system is overrun with atrocious movie games, pathetic unlicensed abominations, and titles so foul that merely mentioning their names causes physical pain to those who’ve experienced them. … Continue reading The Top 86 NES Games – Introduction and #’s 86-74

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