#290 – Hudson Hawk

Hudson-Hawk

                                    

                                                                            This is a far cry from “The Return of Bruno.”

 

Hudson-Hawk-U-5B-5D-0

                               

                                                                    That dog will throw you off a building. No joke.

 

PLAYERS: 1

PUBLISHER: Sony Imagesoft

DEVELOPER: Ocean

GENRE: Action

RELEASE DATE: February 1992

 

“Hudson Hawk” eh? According to many movie buffs, this is either one of Bruce Willis’ best or worst films. Considering the man’s made a truck load of movies, that’s saying a lot either way. Not having seen the film, I, of course, withhold any judgment. Having played Hudson Hawk for my NES, however, I feel inclined to judge swiftly, painfully, and without mercy. Hudson Hawk shall be banished from my gaming library, never to be played again, unless the need should arise to jeer at it with friends and loved ones.

 

I hope you all like broken hands attempting to pick up some dog crap because that’s exactly what this game’s graphics and mechanics represent. Bruce Willis is a fairly attractive guy, but Ocean didn’t even try to recreate his likeness. Instead, we get a thin midget with a huge chin, overwhelming sunglasses, and a penchant for throwing baseballs. Seriously, baseballs are your weapon, unless you want to punch someone squaw in the harbles. Hudson Hawk’s jumping ability is almost non-existent. He can barely get three inches off the ground, and methinks it was designed like this to give the game some difficulty. If you were able to jump like any other competent video game character, you could easily jump over enemies, barriers, gaping holes – anything, really. Because you can’t, the latter becomes unbearable. Hudson Hawk (or as I ended up calling him Hudson “Rock Hudson” Hawk) is one of the most unwieldy and ugly characters I’ve played as in a long time, and as a result, the game itself is close to unplayable.

 

There are worse movie-to-game translations, to be sure, but that doesn’t mean Hudson Hawk needs to be given a passing glance. The NES is already weighed down by far too many abominable movie games. Lord knows the games don’t need to be encouraged by people actually playing them.

 

F

 

The following two tabs change content below.

Latest posts by Dylan Cornelius (see all)

  • And… you’re back!

    I remember this game. I rented it on a weekend (my dad really liked the movie) – but I absolutely hated this game, as I recall.

  • I thought the movie was great but it struck me halfway through reading that, it certainly wasn’t for kids. Lots and lots of quirky off-the-wall humor punctuated with weird and gruesome violence. And so they made a kids video game outta it!

  • @Willis – haha, good points. I haven’t seen the movie in ages… gawd, I don’t even recall how old I was when it came out. I just know my dad had a tendency to buy like, every Bruce Willis action movie that came out back then. You could argue that quite a few NES games got made out of movies that probably weren’t kid material (like some of the horror ones for example).

    Which is still not as bad as some of Atari’s more infamous and unapproved adult-themed games (with such incredibly low-resolution graphics that their very existence is so laughable today)

  • Nintendo Power: May 1991 (Vol. 24) There was a contest that one lucky winner would win a scavenger hunt for a big screen TV (however that worked out) and 5 lucky second prize winners got a Hudson Hawk movie and game pack. I still have that issue on my shelf. I thought boy! if nintendo power is having a Hudson Hawk contest that game must rock! I have never been so wrong in my life.

  • Anonymous

    Terrible movie. Worse game.

  • The funny thing to me about the movie and game is that in the final scene of the movie (I think) Hawk asks the female lead, “Will you play Nintendo with me?” And that is literally the only thing I remember from the movie, except that I did like it.